Apparently elimination communication pushes us past casual alternative parenting and into just plain weird.
You know you've left the realm of "normal" when you find yourself on the fringe just past that ridiculous club of attachment parents.
I'm not quite sure how I got to this place, where my infant uses the potty and my three year old still nurses and I have 30 chickens in my backyard. But you know what? I like it over here. Things are good. Very good, as a matter of fact. Believe it or not, I'm not sitting over here in this place looking down on everyone else...I'm so busy living and enjoying my own life I have no time to worry about what other parents are doing, or what they're thinking about my choices as a parent.
Sometimes I'm startled when I peek out of my bubble.
Everyone one who hears about elimination communication, whether online or in person, seems flabbergasted by the idea. I can't figure out why it's so shocking! There's nothing shocking about helping my baby keep herself clean and dry...at least I didn't think so...?
The first reaction I get is my favorite. "I've never heard of such a thing!"
Well...what do you think mothers did before the invention of Pampers? Before the invention of washing machines? I doubt busy parents wanted to spend time scrubbing cloth diapers by hand. I'm sure they tried to tune into their baby's needs to pee and poop when they had time, rather than sit and watch them soil another diaper that would then need to be cleaned.
And what about the rest of the world, where there isn't a Walmart full of disposable items on every block? There aren't very many disposable diapers for sale all over the continent of Africa, so what do the mothers do? Pay attention to their baby's cues, of course.
The other reaction I get is, "Oh who has time for that?"
The thing is, it's really not time consuming. It takes as much time to potty the baby as it does to change a diaper, and I'm going to be doing one or the other either way.
Then there's the disbelief reaction I often get.
Natural infant hygiene is a real thing--infants actually do signal before they need to go, they aren't just oblivious to their elimination. Baby Ada will squirm frantically, sometimes she turns red or cries out. She does that for a minute before she pees, and it's plenty of time to take off her diaper and put her on the little potty or take her to the bathroom and hold her. Sometimes I can't potty her at the moment, she pees a million times a day. That's alright though, I just change her diaper every time she pees in it so she's not sitting in something wet and uncomfortable.
Sometimes she doesn't want to use the potty and that's alright too. I just put a diaper back on her.
Ada keeps her diaper dry all night long most nights, sometimes for 12 hours! Even I have some disbelief over that. At night she sleeps in a t-shirt and a prefold with no cover. If she does have to pee during the night, which is rare, she wakes me up by squirming and crying out in her sleep. I keep the little potty next to the bed.
She usually wakes me up every morning by squirming around and grunting, which is my cue to wake her up and potty her. Then she relaxes and goes back to sleep for an hour or so. She likes to be dry and she doesn't want to pee in the bed. If she does pee at night she cries until I change her diaper. (We sleep on an absorbent pad, which protects against baby puke and potty accidents for her and leaking breast milk for me.
People misunderstand the idea behind EC. It's not about potty training an infant. It's not about forcing your baby to never use a diaper. It's not about being totally diaper-free for most people, though reducing the amount of diapers you have to use is a plus.
Elimination communication is just what it sounds like--communicating with your baby.
It's simply another way you can meet your baby's needs, just like soothing her when she cries, or knowing when she's hungry or when she's tired. It's not so extreme when you think of it that way. As a momma I try to meet all of my baby's needs as well as I can!
I'm so glad I discovered EC back when Rosie was 9 months old. So far trying it with an infant has been kind of a fun challenge and I've been pleasantly surprised at how Ada has responded. She loves being pottied most of the time.
We aren't that weird, I promise. EC is just a normal part of life for us now.
Erm, well maybe I am a little strange sometimes.
But there really is no such thing as normal.
Right?
Right???
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